Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Emotional week
It has been a rough week. I have been having a real hard time with PMS these last few week. I just get so so emotional. I have deciede that I will start taking my zanax every day. I need something to keep me calm. I get very upset and seem angry during this time. Things are all good now but wow, tough week and a half. I went for another pump-up today. I have to say again...I HAVE CLEAVAGE. I guess when I think of this journey, that is one of the things I have gained. My boobs had always been so saggy. So I am excited about that. I really need to start looking up and not being so negative. I have not been going to Church lately because of work and the boys hockey and I sure can tell. I need to "get fed". I have one more Sunday of work and then I should be able to start going again. My life seems less stressful when I am attending Church. I will have one more pump-up and then I will heal and have my implants put in around the end of December. Thanks to my friend Molly. She has been so helpful to me. I mentioned before, she had the same type of cancer as I. She helps me to know what to expect since has already "been there,done that". She is on the last procedure.... getting a new nipple. Good Luck to her, xxx. I am so glad she is in my life. I look up to her and she is my cancer sister. I get advice from her often. My nerve pain in under control except when I am PMSing It finally is calming down and not hurting so much today. My doctor advised to double up on my pills during those few weeks, when it really seems to bother me. Seems to work somewhat. My middle son Jared, he is 8,Keith and I went to a Red Wings game last night . Poor Tyler is had to stay home due to the flu. Jared played a game at the Joe Louis rink, before the wings played. He scored the first goal, 4 minutes into the first period.! And our team won 3-1. Jared met the owner of the Wings and got a puck signed from Osgood, a shirt that says "I played hockey Joe" puck from his coach with his goal information on it and some other goodies. After his game the team went and had some dinner, then we all stayed for the Wings game. The coaches picked four kids names out of a hat, and they got to have a shoot out during intermission with the team we played earlier. Jared was not one of the four, but he did not mind. He rooted his teammates on. It brought back memories for me because we did the same thing with my older son David. He was picked for the shootout. My sons will have that memory forever. The game was exciting. The wings won the game. It was a great night out. I also have our annual hockey bowling fundraiser coming up soon. That is always a good time. Keith and I do not get to spend alot of time alone together so I cannot wait for that. Hopefully I will be able to bowl. I need to ask my Doctor about that next week. I never really thought about it untill this moment, I may not even be able to bowl. If not I still will go. The parents on the team are a great group of people.I will admit... hockey does take alot of our time and money but, my boys are worth it. We love the sport and the boys love to play. And of course, they are all great players, lol. Tyler leads his team in goals and Jared's team has won all six games they have played. I missed the last tournament because of my health but Jared team is planning on going to Great Wolf Lodge soon. That place is fun.I will be able to wear my bathing suit and not have to worry about my sagging boobs, he he he. So live is looking up for me. My birthday is on Thanksgiving this year. I have so much to be thankful for. I am alive and a cancer survivor now. That seems weird to say. But Molly says so! I had a comment from a lady named Angie. Not sure how she found me, but so glad she is reading my blog. Angie has two beautiful girls and one has just been diagnosed with autism. You will be in my prayers. And thanks for the prayers back. The Lord gives us these challenges. Trust in him. The time will come someday and he will tell us "why". Until then, I just thank him for life,family, friendship and love. Of course that devil trys to get me but, I need to send him on his way. I love the Lord and I am following his word.Busy day tomorrow at work. I have six babies to photograph. Better get to bed it is late. Love and kisses to all.
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